Sorting out clothes and belongings, getting rid of those that I don’t need, keeping a few to remind myself of a country, and seeing cardboard waiting to be taped and formed into boxes seems an all too familiar process I go through. It might be the same for you too.
Apart from this physical process of moving, I experience two sub-processes I go through spiritually and mentally: fear and grief. You may be familiar with the TCK grief, but I’ll leave that for the next letter. For now, I’ll elucidate my fear process– which, of course, can occur any moment even without my moving.
What will happen after I move? Will I be able to find a job? Will I have enough time to write? What if I forget about my friends and brethren in the former country? How will God fulfill His promises in the next country? How long will I take to adapt? What if I experience reverse culture shock? (Reverse culture shock happens when a TCK returns to his birth/passport country.) I seem to have worries and doubts similar to these whenever I start to move.
What’s their source? Fear. Specifically, fear of the unknown. Unknown itself is not bad; however, fearing it means my eyes are turned away from God and upon how vast and uncertain the path is before me. Then I forget Who He is.
Throughout my multiple moves, God has been teaching me not to fear many times. It’s so numerous that I’m frustrated at myself for being utterly weak in this area. At the same time, I saw His patience and merciful kindness towards me. I hope I’m improving, but I can’t do it myself.
I need to beat fear with continuous trust in Him. The word continuous itself means that the action does not have interruptions. Once I stop, I would fear. It’s challenging and impossible for me, but not to Him (Luke 18:27). And I need to remind myself that I can trust in Him because Jesus Christ freed me from the bondage of sin, including fear.
I remembered after I moved to the Czech Republic, He led me to this verse:
“Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.”
Joshua 1:9 KJV
And during these several months, He repeatedly brought this verse to me:
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Isaiah 41:10 KJV
Instead of fearing the unknown, continuously trust the Known, Him, and this process will turn from fear into the trusting process. Are you experiencing fear these days? I pray that you’ll trust in Him, and He’ll give you the strength to carry you through. God bless! You’ll read from me two weeks later!
Very Sincerely Your Sister-in-Christ,
Clarissa Choo-Choo Train
P.S. What can I pray for you? It’s alright if you don’t reply to any of my emails! I just hope that God uses them to be a blessing.
Clarissa Choo is a vessel used for Christ’s glory. Although she has lived in four countries, Heaven is her only Home. She desires to sow His seeds and to serve third culture kids, teens, and writers. Besides writing, she loves to wash dishes, chop ingredients into smithereens, and record hymns on her piano. Peek into her Christian TCK Email Ministry or read more posts.